Tuesday Tirades: Messed Up

I know that since Thursday last week, these posts have been kind of less than dependable. Sometimes things get weird around here and I’m either not in the right mind to post or I don’t have the time to do it and make it good. Because of that however, I have a few things to rant about today so let’s begin…
First off, when you are separated from your love, whether they‘re in the military or not, it can get very difficult. You may be fine and happy for a while, you think you’re dealing with it like you’re supposed to and you talk yourself into a happy mood almost every day. This can go on for a bit, but you can only hold in your true feelings for so long, and then one day they all come bursting out of that cage you had them in. I want to tell you that it’s okay. You are not weak for breaking down like this, I promise. All that bottled up angst overflows eventually and you actually need that release. After a few minutes of this, you’ll be able to calm yourself or have someone else calm you, and you’ll have the energy to put all those feelings back inside that bottle where they belong.
I had my own breakdown yesterday and it makes me so mad every time because I have to ask myself, “Am I being weak? I shouldn’t be doing this, I shouldn’t be doing this, not only for him but for everyone else around me.” Once again I’m being too hard on myself I know, but it’s just how I am. I always ask if I’m being weak when this happens, and everyone says no. After a while of me asking over and over to make sure, I think they’re starting to get upset with me (haha). It’s starting to sink in that they might actually be right about that, and so I wanted to tell you the same. You are not weak. You are very strong for dealing with this and never mistake it for weakness. You’re just reloading.
Secondly, I think the military is kind of stupid sometimes. We’ve already got the yes for me to move down there, but my husband is having a hard time getting over there to talk to the movers and the people about what house we’re getting because they close pretty much as soon as he gets out of school. Everything closes then, pretty much, and I think that is extremely messed up. They have a ton of people, potential customers, that don’t get out until a certain time, so you would think it would be in their best interest to stay open until at least an hour-hour and a half after that time. Apparently not. If so, he would’ve been able to talk to them last week instead of this Thursday. I guess he called them and asked if they would be nice enough to think about someone other than themselves and stay a little bit later to help out someone else. I mean, it’s not like we’re asking them to stay out at all hours of the night. Just until 6 o’clock at the latest, I mean, come on.
~ Mrs. Airman

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